3 year old hitting others for no reason mumsnet. She doesn’t have the rational thought of an adult.
3 year old hitting others for no reason mumsnet. Lots of 4 year olds find this tough.
3 year old hitting others for no reason mumsnet Since starting nursery she has started hitting and really shouting at other children, both at nursery and when we see friends outside of nursery. Apr 19, 2017 · My nearly 3 year old has been really hard to deal with over the past month or so. 9 Ish. She is normally a well behaved lovely bright girl. We think that it stems from DC being jealous of younger child Feb 24, 2024 · She went to the childminder for three days a week since she was 10 months old and started preschool around 6 weeks ago, she goes there 3 days a week. The boy just continued playing like nothing had happened. She doesn't hit others. Nothing too major, quite manageable and infrequent. Oct 27, 2021 · My 3. My youngest DS has a speech disorder, but at 3 he had about 30 words, most of which were very badly pronounced. e was too excited playing with all the other children that he got a bit boisterous and would accidentally knock a child over/fall on them). Jun 16, 2020 · So this is new, my 18 month old has started hitting regularly. I feel like gentle parenting strategies aren't Mar 22, 2019 · I have an 8 year old dd. May 3, 2018 · My 3 year old DS is a wonderful, sweet, clever and friendly boy. If you let them hit at 2-3-4 year old, they will still do it at school. It isn't one bug hit, the other child doesn't cry but it is like little clawing actions but definitely aggressive, he often Jul 25, 2018 · Our 3. We’ve been reading it to him sporadically since he was 2. Ignore the bad behaviour praise Aug 25, 2015 · hi everyone! I'm new on here looking for advice. But his aggressive side is bringing us to our knees. Most children do it at some point. She can share your kitchen. Now will we play with some playdoh' and walk off rather then making it into a big emitional exchange and see if you get a better outcome. 5yo has been exhibiting really challenging behaviour. Please don't let it affect the rest of your family. You are not hitting him everyday as was sadly so common Iin our grandparents generation. Yesterday my son bit his best friend on the arm. They will need more than 'he finds it hard to control impulses and hits out' at 4 years old. co. I feel like he also still doesn't fully understand. But Dh works long hours and never does school runs and tbh has no idea how hard any of this is or experienced a completely out of control toddler plus 5 year old on 2 school runs. Dec 1, 2010 · Then, her 2nd birthday hit and the tantrums started. I’m really embarrassed that my child is causing so much upset. This makes them sound horrible and they're not, they can also be sweet, funny and loving and my kids enjoy playing with them. Mar 24, 2008 · My DS is 3 and a half and has, in the last 2 weeks, starting hitting other children when we go to soft play centres. Aug 14, 2023 · While being told that your child has been hitting other children at preschool can be troubling, aggressive behaviours are fairly normal at this age. Be consistent. Its usually in tantrums and only with me. Apr 8, 2017 · Ofcourse I have not hit him, but he went through a phase of hitting other kids and me, and I was constantly having to discipline him, letting hi. Sep 15, 2012 · My 15 month old hits when he is frustrated, mainly other children over toys or if they are too close, sometimes me and my husband. When angered he will hit, kick, throw, head butt, used to bite but grew out of that. He started out as having very severe speech delay. “We generally expect toddlers to experience some aggressive behaviors,” shares Dr. I don't think saying sorry repeatedly is enough - am I expecting too much? I'm thinking about not taking my child any more !! Jul 7, 2020 · My 3 year old has had a really high temp for two days now, it comes down with Calpol but at end of calpol 4 hour cycle it’s up to 39. He probably did it for the first time about 4 months ago, but it is getting worse. The teacher said this is happening regularly throughout the day. Apr 16, 2021 · To answer other questions, he isn't much better with dad. At nursery she bites ! different children all the time and for no apparent reason. Know he can't hit. Jul 22, 2021 · Really struggling with my 3 year old hitting. They were told to say sorry each time but carried on the behaviour regardless with no further consequences. Around December he started pu Feb 13, 2011 · hi all, my ds is 23 months old. After a few weeks I had a call from school to say that he had hit a girl on the face after an argument about sharing toys. When he is angry he hits me and shouts at me. Apr 25, 2011 · The 6 year old is really rough/violent and will hurt other kids for no reason and in cold blood - usually with a smirk on his face. Jan 14, 2020 · My 3 year old DC has been hitting and pushing over younger children at the childminders. Especially how aggressive he’s becoming I seem to be getting the brunt of it. 3 year olds are exhausting, girls in particular, but she really does sound like she's just being a pretty standard 3 year old girl so you're doing more right than you probably realise! Jun 5, 2014 · The talking helps but don't be surprised if the hitting starts up again. I’d be livid if DD hit another child and extremely unimpressed if one hit her. I find it difficult to understand parents who don’t stamp on this behaviour. How I work punishments is if she's in trouble at school and has been punished there, then we talk about it but there is no punishment at home because what's the point in punishing twice, you never get the full story from kids anyway and you can't enforce a punishment hours after the event. It is easy enough to teach a five year old a lesson. He sounds like a very good partner. We barely got any tantrums when he was 2. For context since birth he has been the most relaxed and easy child. So no wouldn't leave. I wish I could help him. 5 year old daughter has been biting at her nursery as well. I was surprised it started again as I thought those days were behind us. In a couple sentence I'm a mum of three, my eldest son is nearly 10, my daughter who is nearly 5 and Oct 16, 2021 · I think all kids go through some sort of phase between biting and hitting and it's normally to get what they want. was still great 95% of the time! For the past month however she has had her normal little tantrums (which seem to be daily) and she has had 3 MAJOR tantrums which I can only describe her as completely hysterical during. He's high energy sometimes - running around like a lunatic :D but also loves colouring and building towers etc. When your 3 year old is behaving, loads of praise, soon learn that he gets more attention for being good. Mar 16, 2017 · My incredibly bright 6 year old is really loving and caring most of the time, BUT is easily frustrated and lashes out at friends. 5 year old is out of control. " and that's it. Dec 2, 2016 · Hi everyone - this is my first post so be kind . He puts his hands in my face and my eyes too. I have a 3 year old dd who can be awful at times and I feel like I'm living an episode of Super Nanny. They hit out at other kids,throws tantrums,shouting,snatching toys including hurting little May 15, 2019 · Looking for advice. Recently we’ve set up a very simple marble jar reward chart for both kids. He started nursery just after Easter and i've been Sep 7, 2020 · @Motherofmonsters we have a very feisty four year old who will fly into a rage with little provocation. Aug 23, 2021 · No, you pick her up and remove her from the situation. I saw all this from the next room. DD3 was playing with some binoculars at nursery and broke them. My family member still thinks his opinion is no 1 and worst my mum thinks he's just the best. Dec 7, 2023 · It helped that he was obviously a 4 year old spiralling because a play date had gone badly because his friend hit him for no reason. It was for you to dissapline and deal with, not her. Apr 30, 2003 · My 3 year old is regularly violent towards other children. He hits in anger, play and I'm sure just because. Full of attitude, answer to everything, very whiney and up to mischief. Jan 4, 2003 · There is far too much noise from the minute they wake up. Oct 6, 2024 · 1-2-3 Magic: 3-Step Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting: Amazon. This week has been particularly bad at school and he's hit at least 3 kids including, I'm ashamed to say, slapping a child round the face. As you say, maybe they’re a bad mix at the moment. Aug 31, 2016 · Last night for the 1st time ever I hit my 17 year old daughter. I was mortified and I reprimanded him and explained why that behaviour was unacceptable. He has always slept in his own room from about 5 months and apart from headbanging and the usual wakings for milk he has been okay. 5 year old is an amazing kid - so kind, happy and fun. This is causing issues for us all now as he wants to communicate. 5) and they have grown up together. He goes to nursery 4 days a week so I think he may of picked it up from here. You're a great mum and he's just being a normal 3 year old. He must feel like you would if your husband said I have brought home a new wife for you to love and "play with". Nov 3, 2024 · It calmed down as the years went on, probably he did more exercise, to help calm his mood but those teenager years, stuff was broken alot and people were hurt physically. Oct 11, 2011 · Well said ScareyFairenuff! I agree with you. He isn't doing it at preschool (h Jul 29, 2021 · My best friend and I both have sons, her son “O”(age 4. Sometimes it's when he's annoyed at something, other times it's out of excitement. Sometimes distraction. Jun 14, 2007 · Hitting other children is becoming common and today a 3 year old pushed my 1 year old over 3 times. She loves babies ( real and toy) loves hugs kisses and is usually a great toddler. He will not stop hitting me, he does hit others occasionally but mostly me, it's driving me mad, I've tried the naughty step, I tell him off firmly, I've put him to bed, taken him out of situations and made him sit he literally is not bothered at all when I punish him, nothing bothers him to make him stop doing it! Dec 20, 2019 · This might be out dated advice, but I give 3 opportunities to do as asked before consequences occur, for us it was time out to reflect. Since he turned 3 it's been a bit more challenging and lately I am just so out of my depth. Be firm and do something that he will rememberlet him cryhe will remember that too. My 2 going on 3 year old quite likes to hit other children at nursery as a way of getting the toys he wants(we also had to sign an accident form as a little boy bit our LO and it left a perfect mark on his arm). Which I think is ordinary. It was for no reason - not spiteful or anything, they were just playing and Adam got over excited and bit his friend. No matter HOW tempting! ;-) He had a troubled start in nursery, crying, melting down, not interacting well etc. She is getting on well in reception so no issues there. When the move goes to strike the baby you move like greased lightning, grab her hand and say No sharply. She doesn’t have the rational thought of an adult. I was and assured him I'd never hit hit him. He's Jun 8, 2016 · Sorry this is long! I am having a lot of problems with my 3 year old. May 10, 2017 · Sorry if this is a common thread but i'm looking for advice on dealing with my 3yo who is hitting. We have two year old twins. 5 years. Our 2. She is very sociable and we go to lots of playgroups and play dates. Mainly hitting. 5 years, said there was a 2 year delay with speech and dev. I just feel like I'm the parent with the child who's constantly upsetting the others children whilst other kids his age seem to be happy keeping to themselves or being gentle with each other. Jan 16, 2022 · I’m starting to become worried about my 3 year olds behavior. Over my dead body I would say. A child aged two or three years-old who has been hitting or displaying other aggressive behaviour should be told in a level-headed voice why their behaviour is not acceptable. It won't change over night and 3 year olds test boundaries. Unless your child was rampaging around hitting everyone( which it doesn't sound like be was!) she had no right to tell anyone off! Occasional hitting and pushing is part and parcel of going to these groups. You tell her you are unhappy with her behaviour so she can sit there until she is ready to apologise and be better behaved. Oct 27, 2017 · My 4 year old started school this year. But I haven't shouted for 3 days. They are ‘well in themselves’ just slightly lethargic when fever is running hot. This happens in social situations with kids of the same age and is happening regularly at pre-school where it has got to the stage he must have a teacher with him at all times. I don’t know what to do. My LO was really bad from 18-22 mths then she stopped hitting for a couple of months but its just started again at 24 mths. Sep 4, 2013 · We're both firmly of the opinion that violence is unacceptable as a way to interact with others. Ds's best friend is a nice little boy who has a tendency to hit when he gets overexcited (or for no obvious reason). Oct 22, 2019 · My 3 year old little boy has recently starting hitting this week. Ignore the behaviour, first time move away and sternly say "no we don't hit", afterwards continue to move away to a set place with no other attention given. So designate a chair, cut a shape out of newspaper to do the time out/quiet time. I'm disgusted with myself. Mudd. Babies and toddlers have poor impulse control and this is why they lash out for no apparent reason. Also sounds like she's no loss if she never speaks to you again. Then I asked him when I thought I'd hit him, and he said, actually rolling his eyes, "The last time Mummy" I have never hit him! Nor would I. Then you ignore her until she does it. Oct 1, 2018 · I am bit concerned about my 3 year old who turns 4 in December this year. No negotiation, no trying to reason with her as shes 3 she cannot reason. No words yet 😢 he has said a handful of words in his life but never more than once, very sporadic. Lucky for us never at preschool, but particularly bad over lockdown. It must have been awful seeing her behave that way with the kitten. 6 days ago · Sounds like jealousy to me. As time has gone on whenever they meet up, “F” always ends up in tears because “O” has hurt him in some way… when confronted said it was an accident every time but “F” seems to think it is on purpose. Ev Aug 11, 2006 · hi again all. My 3 year old bit me while I was pulling him off his little brother (they have been up since 4am with the clock change so were getting a little mischievous after being told to play quietly for 3 hours) and I slapped him across the face! Sep 7, 2022 · I’ve got a 3 year old and run a baby and toddler group. Three times since he was born isnt child abuse. Nursery worker gently takes them off her and 3 year old goes nuts. She cried and was concerned that maybe he didn’t hear her say sorry. No child I know that age hits another, I don’t see much taking of toys and running away either tbh but they’re not in the same ball park. Dec 4, 2021 · Does he show other concerning behaviours or have other difficulties? Again if this is your concern start with your GP and get the ball rolling and also speak to the school SENCo about your concerns. I hope you both have some other support though as you are hitting two of the most stressful life events at the same time. Mar 24, 2004 · Continuing on from Mo2's suggestion has already said. I have found that ignoring and being calm works best. This has never ever happened before. Some adults have still to learn so she's doing well really. She came in and told me Nanny had hit her 9 times in the face. However, my nearly four year old has been fibbing for a while. Put her down under a tree or on another bench, just away. Sep 28, 2024 · DH remembers being 4 and his brother being 6 and smacking him all over the place. I am not suggesting a return tobthe bad old days but the occasional slap wont hurt and often they happen out of the blue when buttons are pressed big time. Feb 7, 2023 · My five year old DD lashes out at me, her sister and DH when told no or something else she doesn't like. Jun 19, 2013 · The other lady who 'told you off' was out of order IMO. I'm coming to the end of my tether now DS started pre-school in September (he didn't attend nursery before this, he stayed at home with me), he hit a few bumps along the way in his first couple of weeks (I. I have been told he is grabbing their faces and necks…no idea where he would have seen that type of behaviour. So embarrassing! May 16, 2019 · With a two-year-old you have to be right there in the action when she is near the baby. He needs to get seen to ASAP. She has been more and more cruel to me since last March and I am a nurse who sustained a head injury after a patient beat me up in October; she says I've been a horrible mum since then, but I lost the ability to speak properly, wet myself, insomnia, migraine and flashbacks from a violent child hood and Oct 20, 2024 · My just turned 5 year old started school in August this year (we’re in Scotland). Mar 11, 2024 · Hi, My 3 year old has suddenly become really angry a lot of the time and has started hitting, slapping and just being really really difficult. Try using a short phrase such “no hitting because hitting hurts”. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. These tantrums over the last week 4 have been happening multiple times a day mostly when we say no. Massive tantrum which results in her giving the nursery worker a massive wallop in the face! I’m so shocked (but not overly surprised) and was very apologetic. 4. 5) is a year older than my son “F”(age 3. Apr 11, 2016 · A younger child will often do what you say because they are still in the people-pleasing stage, and an older child will often do what you say because they can see the reason/sense behind the instruction, but a 3 year old has their own wants and whims which often trump yours, and definitely won't make any connections to reason. I believe that unless a 5 year old has learning difficulties it is not normal for him/her to hit other children. He loves running around, obsessed with climbing etc bu Oct 23, 2024 · My very sweet 4 (just - last week) daughter has today hit someone at nursery. Don't overanalyse this stuff. I really do. Mar 17, 2023 · Um she sounds like she's 3 and still learning about regulating her emotions and responses. He would say my exact words to others but say I hit him??! So if I told him off he would respond quite aggressively with ' mummy don't hit me again ! Understand ?!! Feb 6, 2012 · Some children develop those skills differently than others and it doesn't mean anything, whereas other children will have more pronounced issues. If you get to a point where you keep saying no-no-no and there is no consequence you'll be in trouble later. There's no reason to think he wouldn't get 50:50 and you wouldn't be there to help facilitate the relationship. As other posters have said. Last year at fireworks night he was terrified of them in his bed and since then we've been having issues with him being in his bed. . Once 30 odd years ago woman told people behind my back "I just dont like her" last time before I had my ds 18 years ago 2 women didn't like me, one came round but the other was unpleasant and unfriendly until the day I left. Sep 4, 2024 · My two year old is three in November. I think you need solid évidence. But how much aggression is too much, and what can you do about it? Feb 9, 2023 · Toddlers may hit others due to their lack of impulse control. Jun 25, 2024 · Pediatric psychologist Emily Mudd, PhD, explains how to manage toddler hitting and other toddler aggression. Paed told us he was developmentally delayed with severe speech and Lang delay. this morning we went to our regular play group and ds1 proceeeded to push, shove, snatch at random and through sand into a little girls hair. 5-year old child hitting my daughter has caused her a lot of anxiety, sadness -and bloody marks on the face. I started with my two from quite early on and they started swimming lessons when they were 3 - to be honest, I think the kids need to have a reasonable level of confidence in the water prior to starting lessons to get anything from them. It's just not right not to punish a child if he doesn't something deliberatly naughty and that hurts other children. We've had a really unsettled couple of years as I had 2 miscarriages followed by the birth of ds a couple of months ago. Jun 8, 2017 · Defiantly a 3 year old thing! My girl was an amazing 2 year old I felt smug when people would say about terrible twos as we never had it. I am trying to impliemnet a few new rules hat will help us all, such as get dressed and downstairs before TV, and no food eaten in the living room. He’s 4 now and still does his occasionally out of anger/ frustration but he knows why he shouldn’t and doesn’t do it very often. But todays incident is a first. Mar 4, 2010 · My 2yr 10 mth old DS hits and pushes other children (regardless of age) for no other reason whatsover even if they are simply walking past he will hit Dec 11, 2024 · I am at my wits end… my 3yo non verbal child has been hitting kids at nursery all week and the teachers have been reporting this since Monday. He Jun 9, 2008 · My 2. The problem is that she has started being rough with other children, but in an exuberant way rather than a malicious way. There's no point in punishing them for something they aren't even thinking about doing. Had first interview with teacher last week and apparently he is hitting other children frequently. But no other symptoms, no sore throat, ear, upset tummy, drinking and weeing normally But a little off food etc etc. During tantrums he will kick, bite, pinch and claw at me. She has recently turned very stubborn and throws a lot of tantrums and keeps crying about little unnecessary things. Jan 25, 2020 · This has happened 3 times at work. May 7, 2021 · I think it's great that you're listening to your kid. Aug 17, 2022 · The other part of me wants to stop her doing it and say “hands aren’t for hitting” or similar (it’s not nice to watch but she’s unlikely to cause herself any serious damage) I’m sure it’s just a phase but would love to hear what some more experienced parents would do Aug 5, 2010 · Time out/quiet time for 3 mins (minute for every year they are). They don’t talk now as this behaviour was allowed to continue for years. It's absolutely horrible, we know a lot of 2-3 year olds and this little girl is the only one behaving violently. Jun 13, 2016 · Ds is 4. It's not nice. I don’t believe in the naughty step, but when I have done it in the past he immediately comes off anyway, over and over again. This gradually changed and by the end of the year he wasn't clinging to one teacher, melting down regularly etc. Aug 28, 2023 · I'm new to Mumsnet, having just googled "toddler hitting others for no reason" and being brought here. By normal I'd mean he spoke clearly with good grammar and an extensive vocabulary. The teachers watch her and nothing triggers it. His sister 15months gets the brunt of it He is cur Nov 20, 2009 · My DS started doing this at about 21 months I think and is still doing it at 3. I don’t believe we should ever hit or smack our children. For thing like spitting / hitting it was an immediate consequence. Jan 26, 2013 · Don't worry, your ds is certainly not the only one behaving like this. He’s clearly bright - almost potty trained fully now and has a fabulous memory. Well with 2 (one 22 months, one 3 3/4) if it hasn't been one it's been the other. Buy 1-2-3 Magic: 3-Step Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting 6 by Phelan PhD, Thomas (ISBN: 9781492629887) from Amazon's Book Store. Certain responses, such as redirection or prevention, may help. It gets better as they get older. Jul 9, 2014 · Hi my is chantelle and I am a new mum baby was born on the 21/12/18 and I have a 4 year old stepdaughter and she was having problem understanding about the baby I was having and when it got closer to my due date he kept saying she didn't want to go to nursery or that ether and one day she went into nursery and started to hold her head and said Jul 21, 2010 · Julezboo, hope things get better soon. Some young children take longer than others to get used to playing with peers nicely. But she’s just turned 3 August then started pre school September and wow she’s on another level. Dec 31, 2019 · 3 yrs 4 m ds hits me all the time, and headbutts me, sometimes on my head which really hurts. Nov 13, 2023 · Leave baby with friend/husband/family. Mar 2, 2014 · My 3 year 8 month old daughter is she can talk but can't talk in full sentences I'd someone asks something is will she be like 'OK' sometimes I feel like maybe she's just a slow child and she will catch up in the future . he has what i would describe as a typical "boy's" personality. Talking with a 3 year old won’t work and allowing them to hit a young sibling is wrong on so many levels. 2-year-olds do get jealous, they do hit babies but they do understand a short sharp no. Nov 4, 2010 · His dad said "Sam, you musn't kick. Jan 2, 2025 · Tell your child firmly but gently why hitting is wrong. Aug 22, 2020 · So I think that you are correct, one should not hit a baby for any reason whatsoever but I also think the baby knows a meaning of "no" and you should expect her to at least look at you and consider her next move. uk: Phelan PhD, Thomas: 9781492629887: Books. But my second- wowzers, he was a different story. Why is my toddler so aggressive? It helps to understand what’s developmentally appropriate for a child. It's been around 3 weeks my daughter has started nursery again after summer holidays, however this time round she is not playing or interacting with other Oct 26, 2014 · Just had an awful start to the day. Feb 13, 2024 · So my three year old boy is the youngest of four and our last child. Feb 27, 2014 · DS, loudly, on a busy train: "I didn't like it when you hit me Mummy". He didn't really have conversations but he could get his needs met and answer questions but talking wasn't something he felt the need to do for any other reason. Jan 15, 2008 · Sorry I haven't read the whole thread, but need to tell you our story. A wide range of interests, from football to insects to baking. She hit my mother (because my mother wouldn't give her a banana before dinner). Lots of 4 year olds find this tough. We fished SALT who said social communication disorder, and referred us to paed. We visited paed when he was 3. Our Aug 31, 2021 · I understand the frustration. Aug 18, 2016 · 3 year old - beyond argumentative with everybody about everything 10 replies user1464795209 · 18/08/2016 06:59 Feb 27, 2016 · Well ds has ASD and had no words at three,he started to talk age five and had "normal" speech by seven. Jan 26, 2023 · My eldest was hard work from about 18 months til 3 and then suddenly improved a lot, and I think other people who experience this then have this expectation that by 3, they can behave pretty well. But 1 thing I love is she knows all her A b c and 1-30 all her animals and a bit of Arabic . Can you factor in some time alone with your 3 year old? Dont expect the 3 year old to love the baby. Jul 30, 2023 · 3 years and five months and my little one is having a tough week too. Oct 12, 2016 · Try to let it not phase you and give it no weight, so react with a smile and say 'oh well, that's a pity. Nov 17, 2024 · Since leaving that teacher three years ago he’s a different child (in fact was a different child the minute the year ended) My reason for saying this is, it’s so great that schools focus on mental health, diagnosis etc but sometimes there is a more simple explanation such as friendship dramas or a crappy mean teacher. Jun 12, 2017 · I've heard people say that it's the reason a 3 year age gap between kids is rare - people with two year olds seldom think "this is great, let's have another one"! Quote Feb 24, 2021 · My 6 year old dd is like this too, she'll suddenly explode over the smallest things. Although apparently "normal" behaviour, another 2. It isn't one bug hit, the other child doesn't cry but it is like little clawing actions but definitely aggressive, he often Jul 5, 2024 · He's two years old and turns three in November. Dec 22, 2023 · The cold truth is that it's perfectly legal to smack your kid if you so choose. Most of it is normal 3 year old stuff, though I suspect she’s slightly worse Feb 15, 2021 · Hello, I'm really stuck with DS and his hitting. She’s pretty bright can have a conversation very well and says that this child upset her so she hit him but she says she doesn’t really know why she did it. Oct 16, 2013 · It happens. She can deliberately go out of her way to thump her sister sometimes for no "reason". Jan 5, 2025 · We have ‘Hands are not for hitting’, which is what they had at my son’s nursery. There's something I read once about being a grey rock and letting their behaviour wash over you, and I find that helpful! Sep 23, 2008 · Then Friday he punched a boy (although it turns out the other boy was hitting him with a stick over the head and wouldnt stop - so both of them had to do time out). mhhjzrsgpciaeygmvbvdervecrsxvzouhgtwxripheohkcijkcafdn